Onions and Potatoes: How to Curse in Yiddish

If you have never heard anyone curse in Yiddish, run right out and and find someone's Bubbe. Ask her to teach you her favorite Yiddish curses. In no time you will be laughing so hard you will be crying.

Yiddish curses aren't straightforward gut wrenching attacks. They are fanciful and humorous with complicated back stories. They serve the same benefit as the expletives that let so-and-so know just where you think they should stick whatever. The difference is that Yiddish curses make you feel better and the object of your curse feel bad but in the end you all end up laughing. Now isn't that an improvement over how cursing is currently practiced?

So why you ask is Yiddish cursing in a food blog? You'll see in a minute. My Mom the quintessential Bubbe taught me this curse. If someone will help me with the technology, I'll try to record her. These curses are meant to be heard, not read.

Vox vi ah Tzibelle, mit Kop in dreard, mit Fees in Luft.

Nah, vox vi ah Potate, in Ganzen in dreard.

May you grow like an onion with your head in the ground and your feet in the air.

NO! May you grow like a potato, completely underground.

Thank you Bubbe. You taught me to be fearless about cooking and the right way to curse.